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December 1969

Manifesto for all Valentoids

Stop imposing the endless lists of soppy love songs on every radio station. Stop trying to sell me things, very few of them have any chance of making me feel better. Especially the chocolates. I'm willing to bet the money I didn't spend on chocolates and roses that its the single girls who are eating all those heart shaped chocolates while doing a rendition of Bridget Jones' “all by myself” scene.

So here's what I have to say: we all have someone to love, its ME, I and MYSELF. Some people have partners, others don't. So why should we be celebrating COUPLE love ad nauseum in a society with a dominant, growing and empowered segment of singles? And then there are the couples who don't feel too much love, and sure they need to work on finding their love at least as hard as the singles work on theirs, but they aren't going to get it on swipe-your-credit-card-for-love.com 

Be My Valentoid!

It's Valentoid's Day today, so give yourself a big bear hug, and if you that way inclined, grab your vibrator and show yourself some love. There is no excuse for not feeling the love today, and maybe even a bit of tingling we all know where. Lennon said “love is the answer” and it is so, but let's keep it real. Another great (if warped) mind said “I was nauseous and tingly all over... I was either in love or I had smallpox” (Woody Allen)

Argentina's Answer to Viagra: Pork..!?

Argentine President, Cristina Fernandez de Kirchner, as of yet not a renowned sexologist, has recommended pork, from her personal experience, as an alternative to Viagra. She is, of course, just trying to share her brilliant realization with the citizens of the world at large, those who are not as fortunate as herself to have had what she describes as a weekend in which “things went very well” with the first man, after eating barbecued pork. 

                           Argentina's Answer to Viagra - Pork!

Oh, perhaps I should mention that Argentina is the world's third largest beef exporter and Argentinians eats more beef, per capita, than any other people. But with beef prices on the rise in the last few years, Ms. Fernandez's government has been promoting pork in an attempt to diversify the meat industry and keep her constituents from placing her head on the proverbial hog roast.

The president, in all her wisdom and fulfillment, added “Trying it doesn't cost anything, so let's give it a go”.

I would beg to differ. Promoting your pork (or beef, for that matter) costs the customer more and more each year. It costs the health care system (ever heard of swine flu, foot-and-mouth disease or the cumulative consumption effects of antibiotic–laden meat?) It costs the rain forests. And, for our purposes, it costs your healthy sex life. Meat is packed with saturated fats which raise cholesterol levels and block the arteries. That leads to to erectile dysfunction and heart problems of the kind that can kill you.

Mind you, it can all be dealt with. You can have your pork, then take viagra to get the big guy back into shape, and when your heart gives in, they can rewire your arteries, so you'll be bedridden and have no need for functional sex organs. But this gives you plenty leisure and freedom to lie back and eat more pork. Hey, don't knock it – its good for the industry.

Strength & Love to the People of Haiti

It's horrible to wake up to a slow, restful Saturday morning and know that on the other side of the world, millions of people are in chaos. Its been four days and nights and this is just the very beginning. 

              Strength & Love to the People of Haiti

Haiti has never been an easy place to live. Though it has the grandeur of being the only state that gained independence from a victorious slave rebellion, this land is troubled by chronic tropical diseases, political evil and it sits like the cherry on the top of the fault line between two major tectonic plates.

Haiti, even in “quiet” times, has a viciously high maternal death rate (670 deaths per 100,000 as compared with 9/100,000 in industrialized countries). The thing about pregnancy and birth is that they don't have consideration for the fact that the country lies in ruins. On the contrary – injury, sickness, stress and loss can complicate a pregnancy and induce a high risk birth.

Most mothers will swear that a regular birth feels like a 7 on the Richter scale when they are the epicenter. I can only assume that birthing during or in the aftermath of a major quake is beyond any level of comprehension.

The Dinah Project wishes the children, women and men of Haiti - especially the newborns and their moms - strength and good health. We can't be there to lend them our hands and share our basic commodities, but Google has set up an amazing crisis response which can guide you in ways of contributing support. 

Susan & Tim: Love that 'Twas

At the risk of dabbling in tabloid stuff, something must be said about the break-up of Susan Sarandon and Tim Robbins. Come to think of it, I have nothing to say. I don't care how they hung in there for 23 years (its obvious, especially from his side!), why they never made their union official under the law, who said what and when, or where they go from here. Couples split, love dies, shit happens. All I really want to do here is recall the great scene from Bull Durham, the film on which the couple met in 1988. 

Susan Sarandon & Tim Robbins: Love that 'Twas

I can't say I care much for Kevin Costner, but I love that cocky “I believe” speech. Here's looking at long, slow, wet kisses that last 3 days. I guess the wisdom is still is finding out how to still have them after 23 years together.

Down, Santa, Down

Does anyone else find it creepy that the Hungarian Health Department has published a recommendation that Santa Clauses should not kiss or touch kids? No, not the idea that government is trying to blacklist a religious symbol; the eeuw-actor is the part that Santa's are getting cozy enough with kids to risk the spread of Swine Flu

Santa could be a risk for H1N1 (Swine Flu)

You see, our friends in Budapest believe that Santa Clauses are old and overweight and a large proportion have chronic disease, making them a high risk group for H1N1 and a few other seasonal infections. Actually seems quite obvious; its almost surprising that it wasn't the CDC who came up with the idea. Or don't they have the balls to speak up against Santa, for fear of a Right Wing reaction.

Hey, if this is the same guy whose coming down all those chimneys (and it is one hard working guy, after all), I would contend that the problem isn't with his health and physical condition, but rather that he's a naughty old man with an overdeveloped affinity for children. And what did they teach us about accepting gifts from strange men?



Android Sex

I chanced upon a blog posting entitled “Japanese Developing Sex Robots” and immediately after gulping, I set out to read it. If it sounds too good/ sick/ unbelievable to be true, that's because it is. 

Android Sex

The blogger, who may know something about robots, or at least wants to think he(!) knows about them, has apparently been spending too much time with his computer and not enough with humans to remember what sex really is.

When I checked out the references on his posting about the robot known as Repliee Q1 Expo, I found that there has indeed been a very woman-like robot developed by Prof. Hiroshi Ishiguro of Osaka University. She has silicone skin, responds to touch and can follow human movement when following a person wearing sensors. But from here to having created a live sex puppet without the will to complain or requirement for compensation, is a huge leap, a ludicrous leap. In fact, its like the leap that the same blogger made by suggesting that the Japanese robot engineers were working in the true spirit of Kama Sutra. Dude – is that like eating sushi in the spirit of Gandhi?

Why is it that if you can produce a mock human, you'd straight away think of how it can serve you sexually? OK, I will concede that designers made it look and feel like an attractive woman, despite its classification as an “android” which denotes a gender-neutral species. I guess its easier to perceive a deliberate subordinate as female, when you live in a chauvinist world. But still, just because she'll do whatever you tell her to, does she have to put out too?

What happened to sex being about the joy of someone consenting to being with you? 

Feminist Blogs contributors @ Pandagon 1970-01-01 00:00:00

Madiba Day Spreads the Love

Nelson Mandela, known respectfully as Madiba, is 91 years young today. And unlike other famous people with the power to move and sway billions of people, the celebration of Madiba's life is all about constructive giving and moving on. 

                                     

The former leader of South Africa, a country with over 5 million HIV positive people, will celebrate today by inspiring benevolence that is truly becoming of a leader and an icon: people around the world are being asked to give 67 minutes of community service. That is one minute for each year that Madiba fought to free his land. A great deal of that time is being spend working with AIDS orphans, health education programmes and sexual health clinics.

And here is the formula that shows the spiritual meaning behind this worldwide campaign (with thanks to Bob Marley):
 
1 love + 1 heart + 67 minutes = 69.
69 + 1 condom and/or 1 dam => Safer Sex.
Just as Madiba would like it.

Happy Birthday. And thank you. 

11 Million Cheers to the Protesters in Burkhas

Ever since the Iranian revolts became an internet-based revolution, I've felt pressured to have my say. What's the connection, you may ask? Hey, with sex there is always a connection.

First, I find it tragic that injury and death to attractive females seems to count more than the males who attended the same university classes. I am referring to Neda Agha-Soltan, and I'm not taking anything away from the sadness and pathos of her online death; I am merely saying that as a young woman, she had even more to gain by marching for reform than the males of her country. As a thinking, ambitious female, she needed to be there. 

                  The Iranian Revolution 1979

This year marks 30 years since the previous Iranian Revolution. In 1978-79, the women were in the forefront of the battle for freedom from the Shah. They took to the streets to revolt against their leader's outspoken sexism. The Shah had actually said in 1973, “A woman is important in a man's life only if she is beautiful and charming. . . . You are equal to a man in the eyes of the law. But excuse me for saying so, you are certainly not equal in your capabilities.” Hmmm. Charming indeed.

It is funny how in 1979 the women protested in Western fashion with their hair flying in the wind. In 2009, they are covered with burkhas, face masks and long dresses, but at least they are popping up on Twitter. Now that's what you call progress.

This is a note to all the remaining brave women in Tehran and beyond. The Shah didn't manage to break your spirit and neither did the Islamic revolution. You have everything to gain from standing up and being counted – in public and in private. 

Ooh, I'm Hot for Your Immune System

First they say that opposites attract, then they tell you to look for a love partner with similarities to yourself. So how on earth are we supposed to know what criteria to plug into www.find-my-sexy-soulmate.com ? 

Science has come up with an answer and the answer has not a bit of either eroticism or romance to it. A Brazilian team of geneticists (Bicalho et al. from the University of Parana) say that love just boils down to MCH, which is an immune system factor. Well, technically MCH explains the attraction, that may work through body odor or structure of the face (they don't know for sure). Somehow it grabs you and sends you sniffing after that one special love whose immune system is so diverse from yours that it gives your potential offspring a chance of having a wider range of immunity and therefore better ability to fight disease. 

                                                          Immune systems define attraction

Does this mean that next time you are drawn to an exotic Guatemalan beauty or a stalwart Masai warrior (either in deed or in fantasy), you shouldn't deride yourself as a slut or brute, but remind yourself that nature was practically urging you on?